BENEFITS OF FORGIVENESS

Benefits of forgiveness

There are three typical responses to being wronged: reciprocating with equal harm, avoiding the person, or seeking revenge. Forgiveness, on the other hand, is a conscious decision to offer generosity and mercy that a person’s actions do not deserve. And, paradoxically, by forgiving another, we benefit ourselves.

The growing body of research on forgiveness is finding that people who forgive are more likely than the general population to have:

• Fewer episodes of depression
• Higher self-esteem
• More friends
• Longer marriages
• Lower blood pressure
• Closer relationships
• Fewer stress-related health issues
• Better immune system function
• Lower rates of heart disease

And they are more likely to be happy, serene, empathetic, hopeful, and agreeable.

Researchers have been able to demonstrate how holding a grudge affects our cardiovascular and nervous systems. They did this by asking people to think about a wrong they experienced and measuring their heart rates, blood pressure, and muscle tension. All increased. The participants also said they felt less in control.

But can forgiveness reverse the effects of holding a grudge? Research is finding that it can. Researchers have studied whether training in forgiveness results in improved well-being. They are finding as they follow up with people that the benefits listed above are significant, and that they last long after the training. This seems to be the case whether the person learned about forgiveness in group workshops or one-on-one.